My first blog ever (2nd attempt)

Ok, well my first blog attempt was not very successful, but here it goes. This is my very first blog ever and I am very excited. I would like to say thank you to aj-day-by-day.blogspot.com for having the create a blog link on her page so that I was able to do this, otherwise I never would have known how. I think this whole blogging thing is a great idea, it is like journaling, but better, because it allows people to share their experience/ strength/ and hope with one another. I'm not quite sure how to make blog friends at this point, but if you're reading this, I guess I'm on the right path. It is so comforting to know that there are other people out there that are going through the journey of life and TTC like me, although I hope none of us stay in the TTC journey for too long.
My DH and I have been married since 6/2004. We have been TTC since we got engaged in 2002. I talked to Gyn in 2003 about not getting preggo, and she suggested we wait until after the wedding to start testing, which we did. Very soon after we married I switched to an OB/GYN and he refereed us to an RE. She ordered an entire workup. There were sooo many test, and it kind of ended there. Hubbys S/A's (like 10 of them) came back a little low, but not too bad. Everything seems to be ok with me. There were never any treatment options given to us. It got very discouraging, a bit depressing, and the whole process just kind of stopped. That was over 4 years ago. We are now back on the TTC train. We are seeing a new RE. We met for the first time in Feb, and he has moved forward very quickly with treatment. I am grateful that we do not have to repeat all of the testing again, I assumed we would since it has been so long. So far I have taken 50mg clomid CD 5-9. I got a positive OPK on CD 16, went in for IUI on CD 17 & 18. Hubby's # were still a bit low 8mil/ 10 mil washed. That is a bit of a concern for me, but I am truly grateful that we are moving forward with everything. Someone said on the WebMD site that it is like restoring hope, and that is exactly true, which to be completely honest, excites and terrifies me. It has been such a long time since I have allowed myself to want children. I always figured when we're ready, we'll go in for treatment, but the truth is that we've both been ready for several years, and that was just something I told myself, and my DH. I have a hard time giving up control of the situation. As long as it was my choice to NOT go in for treatment, then I had the power, as soon as I made the choice to go in for treatment, the power is no longer in my hands and that scares the s!%* out of me. But a baby is a gift from God, I know that and with or without treatment, it will happen when He's ready. It is out of my hands, and always was.
This is getting very long, I guess I had a lot to get off my chest. Thanks for listening.
Brooke

This is my very first blog ever... very exciting!